Wednesday, February 1, 2012

i can't thanked you enough


Yang ada di kepala gw saat ini adalah: harus cepat2 ditulis, supaya ga lupa! Lupa apa? lupa akan every single details feeling gw saat ini, yang ada di kepala ini.
Just to make sure, if something happened dan gw baca tulisan ini, gw ingat akan orang2 ini.

And I believe, this isn't just our
paths crossed together. Bertemu di fase hidup gw yang lainnya.

You know, setiap orang akan punya b
anyak fase dalam hidupnya, fase sekolah, fase pacaran, fase kuliah, fase pertama kali patah hati, fase bekerja, dll.
And I am extremely lucky I've met these people, orang2 dalam salah satu fase gw belajar bertanggung jawab.

It wasn't an easy journey, I must say.
But here I am, standing at the very end.
Excited yet afraid.

2 hari ini merupakan hari yang amat sangat emosional buat gw *actually malah udah dari semingguan yang lalu*
Membereskan personal folder gw, kemudian 'delete'.
Me-log0ff-kan semua automatic sign-in account gw.
Memindahkan semua data, me
mbuka foldernya satu2, dan pintu memori pun terbuka, membayangkan setiap hal yang telah terjadi dari file yang dibuka.
Menyadari bahwa ada moment terakhir saya mengendarai Avanza Hitam *sengaja duduk diam selama 5 menit hanya untuk meresapi berada di belakang kemudi mobil.

Dan kemudian,
Membereskan semua personal items di meja gw, sampe meja gw kembali ke keadaan hari pertama gw ada di lantai 5 gedung Graha Surya Internusa.
Saat2 terakhir menggunakan email vaudrey@id.loreal.com *gw sampe cc email ini ke account pribadi gw*
I try to remembered every little details from every step I took at this office.
Bagaimana rasanya ada di cubicle gw *gw bahkan sampe seposesif 'tidak rela membayangkan akan ada orang lain duduk di meja ini*
Bagaimana rasanya duduk dan ngobrol di lounge.
Merokok dan curhat di tangga.
Langkah2 bangga terakhir saya, bahwa saya juga penghuni gedung ini *saya bahkan bisa dengan sombongnya melewati pemeriksaan tas di depan pintu masuk padahal baru naik ojek*
Menikmati sakit terakhir berjalan di parking lot setelah seharian menggunakan heels 9cm.
Mengingat bahwa saya pernah jutaan kali melewati lorong dengan 6 macam visual berbeda yang mewakili brand yang berbeda.

Dan kemudian,
Wajah2 ini yang ada di kepala saya.
Orang2 yang selalu jadi tempat tujuan berlari ketika hari2 sudah mulai penat, atau sekedar mengusir kebosanan, atau juga terpengaruh suara2 menyenangkan di sudut Shu Uemura, YSL dan PCI.
Orang2 yang setiap paginya datang ke cubicle saya, hanya untuk say Hi, atau sekedar ajakan merokok di tangga darurat *absen di stairbucks we called it*

Orang2 yang selalu dapat diajak ribut, beragumentasi, until we agreed to disagree.
Orang2 yang selalu ada di sana, bukan hanya sekedar berada di sana karena harus ada di sana, tetapi orang2 yang selalu stand-by dengan segala cerita, jokes, hiburan, pikiran, dan mimpi.

Orang2 yang inspirasional buat saya.

And I love them. Now and then.


*maafkan, nanti akan saya upload foto kalian semua, harddisk masih berantakan.. :D


Saturday, January 22, 2011

what is normal?


can i just have a normal life?
without worrying what should i do tomorrow,
what should i wear,
which mask i should take,
how much money do i have?
or how much money i have to spent tomorrow..
or which words i have to pick to talk to these person...

can i just have a normal life?
without worrying about everyone...

just me...




Sunday, January 9, 2011

For The Widows In Paradise, For The Fatherless In Ypsilanti

For the last 2 days, i've been reading my old plurk's timeline for the old time sake.
Sometimes , i laughed for all the drama i've made, and trying to remember what's the story behind every plurk (tweet is the new plurk, btw).

and then, i stopped to this video.




I remember when i accidently found this video, i just freezed. amazed by the sound of the Banjo he played. it just took me to another state of mind that i cannot explain.

well, i guess y'all shud hear for yourself.

Friday, January 7, 2011

it's been a while

Ok.
i know i know i know,
its been more than a year since my last post.
since i am a really moody person.


....


1 year and 8 months

date and time changes

so does life

a full week writing will never be enough to write everything down


....



i always have this passion to read..

literature reading to be exact...

and this willing to write..


but i dont know somehow..

i never managed to commit myself to write.



but this (pointing to my head),

has a lot of things goin on inside.

and i just stuck into my another half in another account..

u named it...friendster, plurk, myspace, facebook, tumblr, and currently, the super happening a man cant live without; CWIDDER aka twitter..

*fyi, i just deactivated my facebook account since it became too annoying*



recently,

i've been reading my friend's blog fadilpinandita with his #30harimenulis..

it leads me to another blogs of literature..

from there, i realize that i miss writing sooo muuuch...

eventhough i never stop posting something (pictures, words, and another inspirational post received from another account) from my Tumblr account, this cudn't stop my desire to write..


well,

from this,

i promised myself to start writing and reading again.

i dont know how this will end *another failed commitment, or i can push myself to write everything that bothers me*

but at least i will give myself another chance.


soo..

see you in another post of mine..

ciao!


Saturday, April 4, 2009

if only there's sumtin i cud do..
i wud give anything just to make it easier...


*a daughter who can only send u all the loves and prays

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

kapan-kapan

okeh...

dia udah kawin...
knapa coba?
klo pun ada yg harus kawin lebih dulu daripada gw...knp dia yaaa orangnya??
the last guy on earth i wud be expecting to be married before me...

say...i will be dead at 50...
n now i'm 23...
so...
i spent almost half of my entire life doin nothin now...
ckckck...
boro2 kawin dah ah...
TA aja blm tau mau pake judul apa...

okeh...
dia udah kawin...
trus gw kapan???
KAPAN-KAPAN ya beb???


sigh!


Sunday, March 1, 2009

workshop hati bersama kawan2

workshop hati untuk saya
dan beberapa teman saya

mengembalikan  hari2 yg sudah mulai 
dimakan oleh rutinitas

dan inilah para pesertanya:


of kros!!








astrimbakbagussemua